Why do narcissists punish fellow human beings with their silence?
It probably took weeks for me – in the midst of my struggle for survival between panic attacks, devastating anxiety, feelings: I can’t manage to reach longing attacks for my perpetrators (peptide dependence) and depression – until I realized that my ex-partner, a cluster B, was not the first narcissist in my life.
Again and again I wondered about the similarities, about the absurd familiarity of the panicked conditions in me, of being subjected to the perceived helplessness, the deep inner conviction of a punishment, the duration and intensity of which I was never allowed to determine, I heard the well-known switch in me, which now turned to survival and provided me with adrenaline for the now insufferables of the coming silence – every little inconsistency was the reason for my repeated condemnation; so I went again to the guillotine. Maybe it was the stake.Sometimes I got the neck shot because it just had to go fast.
Every time I was murdered, I had to take care of cleaning my own crime scene.Sitting like Cinderella in their own pool of blood, I kept wiping away the chaos left by my prince as he recovered in silence. And it was the silence after the act that actually made me die.
Silent Treatment – Silence
You, Dad, an educator, forced me to learn to exist with this method of education.You have sown this seed in me! You have tattooed the meaning of the word CRUELTY on my soul. I was only 7 years old when you had to punish me for weeks with non-compliance. How abysmally malignant must my childlike soul have been when it once again tainted you with her academic incompetence in your pride? Father, I have to feel, touch, touch, hold my children every day, hear their voices – how did you endure not wanting me for long periods of time? How could you look through (d)a child for weeks and not take note of it? You did it again and again to us. What went through your head when you took the steps to my sister’s apartment and, after two long years, had to break your silence on her when her own child died? What, in God’s name, had she done to you that even in the weeks when she feared for the life of her terminally ill child, you did not want to break your silence? Father, as your daughter and colleague: you have failed miserably on the whole.
Whenever my partner became silent, disappeared from the ground indefinitely, or withdrew (deprivation of love), I became frightened – afraid of the weeks of non-observance that lay ahead of me.Fear of sinking into the worthlessness i know so much forever. Panic at the uncertainty of whether he will ever pull me out there again so I can breathe. Panic before the pain as a human being to be defective. My narcissist stabbed my father over and over again. I didn’t have a relationship with my then partner, but with my dad and every time the little girl sat there at the table and wished her dad loved her again and forgaveher everything that made her so contemptuous.
Silent Treatment is a weapon, a method of torture of a narcissist, to make the perceived adversary grumpy, to force him to act or to refrain from acting, to torment him with contempt and to torment him about his uselessness, worthlessness, insignificance formal information.Silent Treatment is a tool to kill children’s souls without leaving any external traces. Silence is the destructive path of a helpless man who, out of emotional incompetence, cannot bring himself to any other solution, but who can still pass away authoritarianly from the self of the other. It is sometimes the clearest indicator that love and the feeling of security is negotiable.