Why can’t I leave (m)a narcissist?

A relationship with a narcissist is not a normal relationship.It is a fabricated relationship that the narcissist has manipulated from the beginning. Several prerequisites make leaving extremely difficult:

  • You have to get rid of a chemical addiction.

A pattern of alternating phases with excessive love testimonies and devaluations confuses the neurochemical substances dopamine and oxytocin in the brain of the victim.They may be chemically dependent on your narcissist. This addiction is similar to a drug addiction that you need to solve in order to walk.

  • They are dealing with a trauma bond. Similar to Stockholm syndrome, trauma binding is a starting point in which a victim is loyal to an offender who repeatedly injures him.
  • This bond also occurs in repetitive psychological, non-chemical-physical, alternating baths, in which the narcissist treats the partner on the one hand highly mistreats the partner and on the other hand treats him courteously. The victim is freed from suffering and bound to an elusive promise for a better future, in which the humiliations cease whenever the perpetrator ceases his cruel acts and is friendly again. They may have the hope that the narcissistic partner can still change.

  • Your narcissistic partner has willingly built up as your soulmate.
  • The narcissist’s motto is to construct a fake reality to get the supply from you to which he is looking for.The narcissist has explored how to behave for you to do what you most desire during the period of excessive expressions of love. The narcissist H. G. Tudor is undergoing therapeutic treatment and writes about what narcissists think. About the phase of incorporation, he wrote a statement that makes me shiver over my back: “We [narcissists have therefore behaved so graciously to keep a door open through which we can come in again and again.” You are in love with the person the narcissist played to you at the beginning of the relationship.

  • You have probably suppressed your own judgment and intuition for so long that at this point his influence is stronger than yours.
  • This is called identity erosion.He or she has troubled you with psychoterror [gaslighting, told you you are crazy and have blamed you for the problems in the relationship. And you probably denied many things you knew for the sake of peace. The narcissist has conditioned you to accept his apologies, and he will express your doubts until you can no longer distinguish what is real. You try to find out if your partner is right or if it is as bad as you think. It’s so bad.

  • You are not prepared to give up your views.
  • They maintain that the narcissist is a good person or that the world is basically good. To truly accept the narcissist for what he or she is sometimes means that we have to face up to the ugly truth about ourselves, the relationship and the world.It’s really tough. It’s just like that. On top of that, a great deal of grief awaits you because of these circumstances. Since it could be painful to give up your views, you may be on the side of the narcissist.

    You can get out of the number, but you need to know what you’re getting into.It takes an average of seven separation attemptsbefore it succeeds and you are not alone when you have to endure a difficult time.They must no longer gloss over things and must be determined. They must also be prepared to comply with the contact ban “consistently”. This means that under no circumstances may you talk to the narcissist or leave any other avenue open to contact him again. The relationship is over. You cannot continue to hope that he will change or secretly hope that he will reach out to you. They have to accept the relationship for what it is and face up to what he has done and who he is. You have to accept the fact that you won’t get answers to your questions and the narcissist will never be ready to conclude (although you can ultimately end the relationship yourself).

    Be prepared that the narcissist will continue to try to capture you.If not now, then later. He or she can do it now and fail and then come back in weeks, months or even years. According to Tudor, a narcissist never really separates from you. Once you have entered into a relationship with him, he considers you for life as part of his “collection”. A “final separation” is out of the question for him, even if all the signs are there.

    I think it is extremely important to know about these things and to be prepared for them.Ban on contact means that all contact has been cancelled for the rest of life.

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