Intelligent people are mostly isolated because it is very difficult for them to find someone to spend their time with.
Average people do not share the same thoughts and worries with them.They think in a different way and therefore they feel that no one understands them.
High IQ almost always means that someone has difficulty trusting his heart and instead relying more on his brain.That is a barrier in the process of socialization because relationships rather depend on feelings than of rational thinking.
Therefore, you should expect to find intelligent people in groups of intelligent people.They love to challenge their minds and also love to discuss complex ideas and compare their perspectives. It’s only around other intelligent people that they can do this and that’s why they feel they belong there.
So it is not just the society that isolates these people.It is also their preference because of their personality and way of thinking.
I can only speak for myself and I have some friends who are facing the same problem (hence the We form).So don’t generalize, it’s just about this limited circle.
What one does with that intelligence is different from person to person.But we all have a few points in common without exception. And one of them is the “alleged” social isolation.
Make a few things clear first.
Wisdom, learning and intelligence are not the same concepts.(Already well explained elsewhere: to what extent is there a relationship between intelligence and good memory?)
Intelligence makes us no 眉bermenschen.
What are some advantages?
We are able to solve complex problems without knowledge and to think logically.That facilitates somewhat the life. Where “others” see problems, we see solutions. Pondering an sich is not exhausting, it cannot stop thinking though.
We generally have a good analytical ability.This regularly comes in handy with the professional choices we make.
What are the disadvantages (and also reasons for isolation)?
We are few (between 2.5% and 0.4%) Of the world population depends on the scale used.That makes the feeling of the “normal” man difficult.
In general, we have a lack of empathic ability, which is not to say that we have no emotions.Many of us have musical skills or do something with art and that still requires some emotion.
We get arrogant and one experiences us as a betweaters.
We do not have the impression of being well understood and in turn understand the others.Therefore, we regularly hurt people while that is not the intention at all. And when we are aware of it (feedback), we feel rotty and guilty about it.
We learn social skills by making an analysis of what we experience with our fellow man and agitating in function of it, while relying on that empathy.It is a long-winded process.
And what might be the worst, we often hide that we are intelligent for fear not to be accepted.In a strict hierarchical structure even more because one does not want to sacrifice its “superiors”. Not being able to express who we are without being arrogant is problematic and a burden to bear. And even with the brake on it, we are still perceived as arrogant. One feels that apparently. And that strengthens the feeling of “not being understood”!
I think there are quite a few people who will recognise this.
Footnote: The lack of empathy that is often reproached comes from both sides.The “normal” man is also not able to be empathic to us.
I am intelligent and tend to isolate me socially.I can’t quite explain exactly how it is related to intelligence, but this is my theory:
When people say ‘ intelligently ‘ most think of IQ, but this is only part of the total intelligence.We have different types of intelligences and there are also different layouts. One of these is: Verbal, logical, visual, musical, physical, interpersonal, intra-personal, nature-oriented, existential and moral. I have eg. A high logical, visual, intra-personal, nature-oriented, existential and moral intelligence, but in return a low verbal, musical and interpersonal intelligence. It is actually more complicated than that, but because of that (among other things) I can’t cope with people well and don’t need it either. Communication is very difficult for me.
You can also view it in terms of emotional intelligence.Emotional intelligence is more important for success in life, and too high IQ stands in connection with less success in life. Luckily, you can train your emotional intelligence better than IQ.
The biggest reason I prefer to be socially isolated is by social anxiety (the paranoid version of embarrassment).That has to do with life events, and the way I go about it is based on my specific balance of intelligences. Fear can also affect intelligence.
Even though I have an IQ of 130 (according to an online test) People often estimate me stupid, because in social situations I don’t always know how to behave, because I have trouble talking, finding words and phrases in real time.I always have to calculate everything correctly. I am also highly sensitive, very introverted, very conscious of the environment and far too self-conscious while I consider myself extra to be good. Through all that incoming information and by wanting to check everything too much my head has it in social situations so much too busy and by fear I can concentrate what really matters.
In addition, things I think about and what I am dealing with do not correspond to the average human being.My way of thinking is sometimes too abstract to word. Sometimes I just feel like an alien creature.
When I drink alcohol I have less anxiety, I become more dumber and simpler, and people find me smarter.Then I can suddenly find my words, talk fluently, and the body language comes in a natural way. Of course, it was not a good idea to use alcohol, but that is another story.
Luckily it is not a problem for me to be socially isolated.One of the happiest periods of my life was when I lived for half a year all alone. But before that, I needed a somewhat depressive adaptation period when I first started losing all friends, until I could loose the social norms and free my own way of thinking. Sometimes I still want people to leave me alone because I’m stuck right between two worlds. That of me and the social world.
This is largely a result of the fact that there are few other intelligent people, compared to ‘ average ‘ people.
Very intelligent people are therefore simply less likely to establish contacts with similar intelligent people.This does not mean, of course, that intelligent people cannot establish contacts with less intelligent people, but often meaningful contacts are only created in people with similar intelligence.
I don’t know if I should describe myself intelligently with a complicated diagnosed personality disorder whose delusions are part, a disharmonic IQ and almost a decade of no work.There are certainly cases where people could conclude that the above value of 140 is a good indication. But there are certainly cases where it could be concluded that the lower value of 95 is still a bit on the high side. And I cannot describe myself as completely socially isolated.
To there was quite a period when I was a textbook case of Dunning-Kruger.I literally thought I was smarter than everyone else. During that period I was also practically completely socially isolated because I felt simply not understood by people. They didn’t understand me when I explained something, they didn’t understand my feelings. While I was often wrong myself, or had a lack of knowledge and had no notion of what I felt at all. But what was ultimately all due to my delusions.
I can imagine that a person who is truly intelligent is also genuinely feeling so.And that the proverb ‘ I’ts ifeoma at the top ‘ really does apply. Ultimately, we all want to be understood.
Smart people are usually also busy with clever things, puzzles let’s say.If you want to progress in something difficult, you have to learn extremely much. His situation also requires a higher level of selfishness and isolation than what the average human being needs and would like to have. Think, for example, of Albert Einstein and the fact that he has always escaped the problems in the relationship with his first wife, his entire life. That’s because he just didn’t have time to do social and also had little motivation to be socially engaged as he made much more satisfaction by working on his theories. In contrast, “ordinary” people get the most satisfaction from social activities. That also takes time and therefore you have less time available to learn from books.
So in summary I think the difference is that smarter people get more satisfaction from learning than social pursuits and thereby more time in sticking and as a result become isolated more quickly.Isolated anyway compared to average smart people.
It is true that you say that intelligent people are often less social.They will probably feel lonely sooner. I do understand that they like to deal with ‘ equally intelligent ‘ people to spend their time with, not to get bored quickly.
When I look back on that feeling lonely, I do not think it is always up to the ‘ intelligent people ‘. I myself don’t really feel myself when I talk to gifted people.I feel more dumber and inferior. And to avoid that feeling, I am, therefore, thinking less about with gifted people.
I have more ‘ less intellectual friends. ‘ I have more fun with it, I can be more myself and feel more intimate.That for me is the definition of friendship: you can be yourself.
I also don’t think you can speak of stupid and clever people, everyone is clever in their own way: some are good in mathematics, others in languages, some have a great general knowledge, others are just good at music.And if we get our report at school, and someone gets 90 and the other 60. This does not mean that 90 is also effectively smarter than the 60. He probably found a better way to study. Or has a better memory.
On the other hand, it is of course always interesting to learn something from intelligent people.
And then there are also people who feel smarter than they actually are.Do you know that? For example, I do not think that is intelligent. You shouldn’t jump above it with your cleverness: people must be able to feel good about you. In general, they also characterize me as stupid and naive. But they feel good with me, and I also call it a form of intelligence.
Firstly, there are a lot of categories within the concept of ‘ intelligent ‘.People with very high IQ, for example Asperger (gifted autism), score a lot less well in terms of social intelligence. You have to look at intelligence as a kind of Libra, where you tend to be more inclined towards social phobias the higher the IQ. The EQ, the emotional intelligence is estimated too little by value because there are not many suitable tests for it. And because it is simply considered less important in the production company, look at the low wages of people working in the social sector. Psychiatrists, on the other hand, often earn money as a mud, but that is something else, there you don’t have to possess a high EQ, but IQ since the storage and reproduction of facts was important for the doctor’s training and the subsequent specialization. Well, it is not so strange that ‘ intelligent ‘ people isolate themselves socially, because logically they are ‘ different ‘ than the masses. Both EQ and IQ. Every person needs understanding and recognition as a basic need. One wants to be accepted and not an outsider. That gives feelings of fear, dislike and depression. Sharing your own thoughts with like-minded persons is very important. Hence the success of fellow groups for gifted, denkrefuelling, project groups etc. In addition, someone has his character, how one treats his individuality and emotions, the value judgment that you give to yourself. Highly sensitive people (counterpart of autism but very similar to those who don’t know it) have a lower self-esteem anyway as they are very focused on others and can relativate too little to go really relaxed through life. Logically, they sometimes have to pull back because they become overstimulated. Whether it is flights after overstimulation (EQ) or avoiding social situations from inability (IQ), one has to get out of self-protection here, out of the crowd. And we all have that feeling since it’s damn tricky to deal with others. Just look at the multicultural society or smaller, to relationships. Education and the labour market focus on forming productive ‘ sheep ‘. One dedicates far too little importance and time to shaping the mind, to the psyche and learning to deal with oneself and the others. To human communication. It must muster… Man searches for meaning and values. That is why everyone is dehumanised and should deny his own nature. Hence also the success of psychological counseling etc. A vicious circle in which individualism is considered normal. No, one is not made to live alone, but there is a capitalist system that has lacquer. Questions like these are therefore very valuable for people to broaden their vision and to give back their value. There is nothing wrong with the various types of people. There is only something wrong with being a human being to live in this system that does its own nature as an unimportant detail.
Sometimes.Not often. And don’t forget that stupid people are socially isolated too. I would say, look for each other once.
For a barbeque or a beer in the sun.Go to a musical. Help the ‘ clever and stupid people ‘ to have a nice afternoon.
For it comes down to it; It’s a choice.