After my narcissist died and I was doing some additional training at the time, I didn’t even have time to process my grief.After that I was much in nature and only realized that I actually lived his life and not mine. Step by step I have reoriented myself and found myself again. It wasn’t easy and I still wonder if I endured it. He was also an alcoholic who finally turned on and suffered from Korsakov syndrome (similar to Alzheimer’s). It is only after that you realise that one was really “dependent” on the terrible escapades. One has “embedded” one’s life entirely in his malices. No idea how I could endure these years in the dark “Kerker”. I went all by myself. Sometimes I take a look back and am glad that I am still alive!
To understand the pattern, I have read many books, blogs about narcissism and personality disorders.
Reading testimonials from other people affected also helped me a lot.
My own shares question why I allowed it so long that you exceeded my limits.
I then returned everything pictures, gifts, her to get your picture out of my head to be free again.
I haven’t blocked you yet.
I also have the support of a psychotherapist to deal with my topics such as demarcation.
I’m still working – to find that calm, but slowly it goes up, you have to turn on your head and the feelings you still have – usually it’s anger, insults etc… displace and distract yourself with things you like to do
For me, the work is not yet finished to find the right peace.Very likely to take a bit. How a commute to the end stands in the middle.
Only after my awareness that he is not able to perceive the normal emotions as normal people are, then all the scales fell away from my eyes.
Basically, That I myself had become or is co-dependency. Thanks for the very much publication about narcissism and its help I start to do the inner work, the inner child, me examined myself, why & why was this so?Why have I accepted his extreme character all these years? and Always strives to maintain the marriage, 20 years together with Dr Hide & Jerkill rolled however accepted to let me be manipulated, even by myself and always brave by his side because of my beliefs such as ” all women must suffer ” . Only after Grand Final, I discovered myself the same patterns of my behavior.
That’s why I have to change myself!My inner child should heal, me from sacrificial role to self-confident self, learn to love me first, give me healthy selfishness. It’s no more beautiful than that ! I appreciated myself.
So I’m going to attract a different partnership because I’m authentic.
Many conversations with a trained therapist helped me.Talking to people who have had similar experiences. Really wipe the narcissist out of life completely! Don’t inquire about him or secretly stalk on Facebook or anywhere else, the narcissist will leave clues for you at every point. So you can never forget him and heal yourself and that’s his perfidious plan! I have to say for myself that I have unfortunately become a perfect conarzisst. Treating this will be the next step. but
To the happiness I am a very independent person, and I get good alone.So I finished it clip and clear. I was also able to get it out of my head and did my own thing very quickly. I had many friends who keep on my side and can do well with something else
Since we have a son together, this process is complicated.A home of your own, friends of their own, who do not let themselves be manipulated by him, pursue their own hobbies, think as little about this person as possible, are the points that help me to find peace.
Having understood that he himself is a victim, I can forgive him and I am no longer annoyed with this person.Anger and despair sometimes come up, however, as he treats our son like one thing and I have to rebuild my son after visiting weekends. My son now understands some things and can handle them better.
I haven’t found peace yet…
After 8 weeks no contact, I wake up in the morning with the thought of the narcissist.
It’s still getting better, through conversations with my friends.Distraction through sport is good and new hobbies to find.
I’ve carried on my simple, simple life and I don’t let myself be changed and I love my children, grandchildren and fellow human beings in my neighborhood and my little dog.And the wonderful nature inspires me again and again. Yes, with God’s blessing, I am happy.
To realize that the other is who he is and no one else can be.That there collide two worlds, which create a true psychoarmageddon due to the desire for redemption of one and the desire to fulfill desire of the other. And what is really my set of redemption when I encounter this dark matter with Elbe fires “It’s brighter clear noon and not dark night”.