I have learned too late in life that career, status and work are not the most important things.Also things like distant travels and many “experiences” like that fashionable hot suggest little. Self-development has more to do with your inner self and with dealing with people who really matter to you like family, children, life partner (s) and friends. Happiness must be found in yourself, others cannot give you.
Crazy enough I started studying neurology on my 750th.And the day before yesterday I received acceptance of my first article about my research in this field.
Why learn something new in my life so late?
I saw my grandfather from mothers side on his 750th still cut in the winter.Hoops cutting for Basketmakers had been his profession. As a child I thought “I want to be so strong that I can still work on my 750th.”
I did that, albeit that I added a variant: Working in a new field for me.That keeps Alzheimer’s out of the door!
Hmmm, because it’s learning: ‘ Better late than never ‘, it’s not soon too late to learn anything.
We are people and falsive.Our lives are a long way from experiences and we learn from it.
Of course, it is unfortunate that I have not had more patience with my parents, my children and some employees.Of course, it is unfortunate that I have only gradually learned to stimulate people with questions and suggestions instead of pointing them at their stupidities. I would have been a good teacher, but I am not a teacher, I am a loner who is not exactly flexible.
I have a neighbor and who is called a good teacher.He is good at his profession because he is incredibly curious, and disciplined in learning and researching things. A year and a half ago he was with his wife with me in the car. We drove over narrow Belgian outroads where two cars could just pass each other. I had the idea that he was not quite at ease (of nature he is on the very cautious side and inclined to take all sorts of trouble into account) and I thought he might want me to drive slower, but no, it wasn’t. This is what I was told: Yes French, you drive nice and quiet, but don’t you think that if you get to a side in the roadside, that it will be very difficult to correct that car, if you only drive with a hand on the wheel?
Of course he was right.It was just a bad habit, out of convenience, which had been worn in the years. And almost every day I think about it and I quickly keep both hands on the handlebars.
The new thing I had learned was not that you could better keep both hands on the wheel, because I knew that for a long time.The new was that you can correct people so that it is not aggressive or unapprosive, but constructive and motivating. Look, I would have liked to have learned earlier.
I have learned too late in my life that addiction comes in many forms.After overcoming a drug addiction on my 29th I ended up on my 55th in an even deeper valley due to my relationship addiction. The impact that addiction has and had on my personal life is enormous. You remain an addict for life. Your brain has actually changed and you remain vulnerable.
The second thing I learned too late is what NPS is. Living with a partner with a narcissistic disorder was life-altering.Nothing after that was ever the same.
The third thing I learned too late was that childhood traumas never left a lifetime.
But maybe this life is the same as it should be.You won’t learn too late. You have just been desperately in need of these years to get to this point in the end. What’s too late?
Discipline.Simple and honest. As a parent it is important to teach a child that to achieve something, discipline is important. I’ve had it too easy in a one-parent family, so I was praised for easy things and difficult things were often offered a detour. That has often healed me.
In addition, mathematics, but also now that I am still doing extra, I know that it is difficult to ‘ linger ‘.I am therefore a more intuitive person. My youngest has that too, but I try to keep her from the mistakes I made.
I have learned too late that although we like to hear somewhere, that our lives are much too peat influenced by others.
We want too many other Pleasen, nice to be found to hear about it.
In itself this is not bad, but I have learned too late that you can lose yourself very easily as a result.
If you think deeply, then you can probably think of some situations where your gut feeling says you don’t want something, but still does.
That you have done things to hear, or not to get criticism, e.g. of family and friends.
Or, that you often “swallow” things, just pretending to be doing nothing or not hearing it, while you are actually suffering from it.
Now that I am somewhat “older” (48 years), I realize that even the most charismatic people, the leaders around us, the most discerning people (your father, mother, other family or family member, your boss etc) also just have their own worries, uncertainties and issues.
In other words, they are mainly concerned with their own world, and project their dissatisfaction, criticism or negativity on you because they struggle with it themselves.
I have now learned to let go of that much more, to do my own thing that I feel more comfortable with.
This sometimes causes crooked faces, loss of friends or contact, or comment… What have you changed!
In essence, we do not change at all, we grow.
If they say you’ve changed, then that’s right.
Then you have changed… In yourself.
And that’s good. If that is not accepted, then it is.
You don’t have to be loved by everyone, you won’t find anyone nice?
The right people will find you very nice, as you are.
Actually a lot.It’s hard to say. I think I just needed all this time to come where I am now. Had I been a bit quicker then I could have been able to draw some more swift Profeit, you could say.
But so, what is life?Is it actually going to be somewhere to arrive? Is It perhaps no longer a matter of living somewhere, working towards it? Discover. Gaining the joy of understanding. Just the appreciation that you understand something better. Or the appreciation of the things you have.
Then it might not make that much difference where you are at a certain time, but more that you are appreciably growing or appreciative.
Perhaps that is an explanation why, in our eyes, poor people sometimes seem to be happier than wealthy people, for example.Rich or poor in all sorts of fields: financial, capacities, intelligence, health, social contacts, knowledge, insight, etc.
That people on the globe are walking around who are not well-equipped with others.I previously couldn’t imagine what terrible things some people do without any guilt. My pink bubble has burst in the meantime and has become more realistic and less na茂ve.