What happens if you “shoot” a narcissist?
Narcissists don’t really want a relationship.They don’t want to build anything with anyone and they don’t want to share anything. They don’t want a partner.
It is not a partnership if a person exists only to be oriented towards the other person without needs, desires or own expectations.It’s slavery.
You are not a partner.You are a slave. Better said, an object. We don’t have a partnership with objects. We use objects and get rid of them and replace them when they are no longer useful.
Thus, narcissists deal with other people, except that objects (objects) when we use them are not violated by use.
The narcissistic relationship is therefore more parasitic than anything else, because the narcissist uses other people to harm them.They cause suffering, in other words.
Like a tapeworm.No matter how much you eat, if you have a bath worm, you are always hungry, because the tapeworm gets the most. When the tapeworm becomes too powerful, you literally start to starve. Such is the relationship with a narcissist. They take everything and you have nothing left.
Some say narcissists are intimidated by bonding, but this is really a “sugar cast” of their real feeling.They have a morbid fear of it. It is life or death for them. Their existence literally depends on their needs not [just being first, but only. In their perception, taking care of the needs of others means saying their own did not matter.For them, it would be an emotional suicide. This could even lead to actual suicide.
Narcissists are not simply “selfish people.”Their entire existence is based on this point. Therefore, they are incapable of understanding that a partnership includes two equal partners: for them, only their own needs count. The other person is only used to fulfill them. There really is no more.
This cannot be changed or put right, because in order to change this, the narcissist would first have to understand and acknowledge that the needs of the other person are just as important as their own.And again, that would be the same as emotional suicide. You can’t. Their symptoms were developed out of the need to protect the narcissist from exactly this and has evolved further and now determines her whole life.
So, this realization will not happen.
So much for the translation.I have translated the original English question about Alina Ionescu’s answer, but I am not sure that it has not been changed in the meantime, because as a teacher I would say: topic is slightly missed.
In her last sentence, she wanted to express that the N. will not recognize the reality that he is being reserved, abandoned, thrown out, adopted, but will either not be recognized as such, but either, to the extent that he has “supply”, it turns as if HE had ended the relationship, or, however, always arrives and wants to carry on, no matter how.