What can Dutch people learn from Asians and vice versa?

My wife is Chinese,

She is less direct than I am.

Those are her mother, father, cousins, nieces, as well as her Chinese friends as well.

I suspect this is culture-driven.

If my wife and I talk about sensitive matters, and she wants to make a point,

Then it is often easier for me to decipher a seven-star Sudoko than to quickly see what my wife exactly means.

I am not well aware of what I can learn from it.

Sometimes I try to make a point similar to my father in a cumbersome manner.

The result, however, is often that we both forget what we talked about again.

No success.

My wife is sometimes, encouraged by me, somewhat directly to her mother.

The result is often that they are full-bothering and they both suffer for weeks.

Also no success.


My wife is in China not only raised by her parents,

Her grandfather and grandmother, who lived in the same house, had an equally large role.

As an illustration: until the age of 12, my wife shared a bed with her grandmother.

Grandma and Grandpa had an active role in the family, with a great responsibility.

Grandpa and Grandma were always there for my wife, corrected her parents where necessary.My wife grew up in a very protected environment.

When she was admitted to college, she got it heavy.She left her familiar environment for a place where no one could directly assist her.

She was not the only one who had difficulty, many of her friends experienced the same.

I cannot speak of all of Asia, but young people who in China, and South Korea are going to the university are often really much more chilmore than Dutch students.

Dutch youngsters seem more independent, pieces harder and better prepared.


It one flows over into the other, somewhat tricky to indicate, but what I, I think, try to say is:

Dutch people can learn from the active role that grandpa and Grandma have in many Asian countries within the family.And wider yet, we can learn a lot from the respect that is there for older generations.

I cannot speak about all of Asia, but in China and South Korea one can, on the basis of what I have seen, certainly learn from the more autonomy-oriented education of Dutch children.

Asia as a continent is very large.With Asians, I limit myself in this response to Asians from the Far East, i.e. east and Southeast Asians. Finally, these people are probably referred to by the questioner. In addition, these people seem culturally and also racially alike.

West Asians such as Turks, Central Asians like Turkmen, North Asians like Russians and South Asians like Hindoestans I leave aside.

The most important thing is that Dutchmen should not always get right and put other people in place.Here you do not reach anything and in Asia (East Asia and Southeast Asia) certainly not. Even if you think you are right, you should not let others lose their face. It is better to have a friend than an enemy.

As far as Asians are concerned, they can learn the professionalism and immediacy of the Dutch.I find it more pleasant to be able to be straight, without being rude.

Furthermore, the Dutch are fairer and there is less a shame culture.I think Asians should also be honest (er) to acknowledge their possible mistakes.

Asian parents can also learn from Dutch parents to be less authoritarian, listen more to their children and give the children more input.

I sometimes find the Dutch quite boastful.This is disapproved in large parts of East and Southeast Asia. One should be modest.

On the other hand, Asians can also learn from this and be best extroverter.

I leave it here.These are some small things that could be useful.

Thank you for asking me this question Cornelis Zandbergen (Cornelis Zandbergen).I hope I have answered your question with this.

Dutch people could learn to be more friendly, without having to be spicy.

Many Asians would do well to politely but clearly say what it stands for, instead of wanting to avoid being rude in circles to keep turning around, saying no is rude to some, so fatimoning….

As an Asian I attach great value to ambition.Many Western people let that sail and level boring, disappointing lives.

For the rest I find the Asian culture mostly obsolete.

The Dutch, despite their innate common sense, can learn from Asians that they are not always “right”.Trust and relationships in Asia are more important than common sense.

Asians can learn from the Dutch that common sense is often more important than trust and relationships and that therefore the Dutch are often “alike”: Business matters.

Is in which area.But in general the Dutch are known for their direct approach, which in fact has a contradiction in the polder style of consultation. Of Asians you have many shapes and sizes. Indiers everywhere have a menng about it, Javanese are rather touchy and so on. Hard to say something about this. Asia is very large, the Netherlands very small. Maybe we should learn that.

I once read the book of the American-Chinese mother Amy Chua: Fight Song of a tiger mother.Although she herself said that it was sometimes a bit exaggerated, many parents can get something out of it. Away with that chronic tutteling.

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