It is not love for someone with a narcissistic personality that you can compare with Stockholm syndrome.The love that someone feels for someone with a narcissistic personality (NP) is with nothing to compare. It is therefore that the people who fall in love with a NP also do not feel understood, and do not even understand themselves.
But in some cases Stockholm syndrome does apply to the relationship someone can have with a NP.When the (Love) relationship holds out long enough, there is what one calls in English “trauma bonding” instead. In some cases, Stockholm syndrome (SS) plays a role in forging this traumatic band.
The SS acts in ‘ normal ‘ cases (i.e. in case of hostage) at approximately 8% of the hostages, when two conditions are met:
A.The hostages treat the hostages well.
B.The hostages can identify themselves with the purpose of the hostage-holders.
In particular, the latter is obviously clear in the case of a relationship with a NP: Both parties benefit from the good relationship.So both the ‘ hostage ‘ and the ‘ hostages ‘ are literally pursuing the same goal. But also the first part, in a relationship with a NP, is more a matter of perception than reality.
The NP (or any other manipulative personality) naturally manipulates the partner from the outset.The partner often does not know what is right and what is crooked. Talks with (ex-) partners of manipulative personalities show more than once that they feel they are losing their minds. That they are doubting everywhere. In some of them, their self-esteem has fallen so far that they sincerely think they have earned the treatment they are getting. So sometimes they do not even find that they are treated poorly… Not even if they are mistreated. Sometimes not even when they are physically mistreated.
Under these circumstances, the probability of the SS occurring and contributing to the formation of the traumatic bond between the manipulative personality and the partner.What is actually going on is that the initial love for someone, the emergence of a traumatic band, where the SS thus sometimes helps or is part of it, keeps the relationship instant. If those same persons would meet at that time, with that behavior, there would be no love.
Feeling love for someone m.i. always means that you fully accept that person.And you can ask any partner of a manipulative personality after X-time if they would accept their partner as they have met during this time. Their honest, cognition-based answer will be ‘ no ‘.
You can compare it, and then you’ll find some similarities.Manipulation among others.
However, there is a big difference.Love for a narcissist is going to love one person to another. That, although partly incomprehensible, is a free choice.
The Stockholm syndrome describes a “syndrome”, thus several factors.That is not the love of the One (abducted) for the other (kidnapping). The gene that suffers from the syndrome can also identify with the case where the kidnapper is fighting and joining. Then there is no personal love.
Best interesting point I find one of these days I talked to someone about this and those with whom I talked (sits in long term relationship) called it to be like Stockholm syndrome.Because it comes to me also known I find of applicable yes even though it is here rather to emotionally torture at Stockholm both and is perhaps more intense? Don’t know if I was always happy. Think that has something to do with each other. Checking the truncate of others, the web they call it too. At Stockholm everything is rather determined on the physical yes kidnap torturing victim locking up is more hefty used more intense but the steps also compare the process end result anyway.
In kidnappers or hostages (those who hostage) it is a matter of survival to be found nice.The criminal wants to gain a (mostly financial) advantage with you as collateral. Unless that criminal decides to kill you in the first few minutes, you can “be found” by trying to prolong your life. Or the criminal wants to avoid criminal prosecution. Clear goals, generally.
With a narcissist, your survival is literally not his/her problem.Maybe it seems in the beginning if he/she does not yet get his/her intended target, what he/she wants to have, as if he/she has everything for that person, but as soon as he/she gets it, that sweet behavior is also radical. That will initially amaze the person who is the target of the narcissist. But that person then lays the blame (first) to himself. The narcissist has chosen that person (very calculing).
By the time that person has the situation all the way through, the narcissist has completely isolated that person from everything, which can provide a way out of this situation.Friends are discouraged from interfering with the couple. This is done by the person himself and not by the narcissist, although they will try (and reach) in all sorts of ways, to let the idea at the person’s post, that it is ‘ better ‘ for that person to listen only to the narist.
As you see, that is a completely different dynamism, and a very different mechanism.
How can I describe how a narcissist is in detail?
I am the son of a now deceased narcissist, or it was in any case someone with very narcissistic traits.I was quite systematically isolated from my environment. My stepmother couldn’t do her hard enough to make it to the liking and was also isolated. Never did anything. I also learned to know others, due to being victimized by a narcissist, when, in the first instance, I went out of home for my studies.
The above is a fairly summary summary of a lifelong experience with the syndrome.However, my knowledge about abductions is not based on personal experiences (fortunately), but on online and in books gained knowledge about it.
It is similar in that.
But let’s first look at what the Stockholm syndrome entails: it is a phenomenon in which a hostage person develops a certain emotional adhesion to the hostage (and this is because the hostage treats the hostage well during the Hostage).
It is important to emphasize the fact that this is not voluntary, but that it is about adhesion through trauma (it is the event and subsequent interactions between the hostage & the hostage person who causes it).
During a hostage, a hostage person gets traumatized (it’s a big shock and frightening).
If the hostage is treating the hostage pretty well then the hostage person can therefore get attached to the hostage.
A person may be aware of the fact that the relationship is unhealthy, but that does not prevent both individuals from developing an addiction to each other.
So yes, the so-called Stockholm syndrome is similar to the emotional bonding & adherence that arises in a narcissistic relationship.
That is totally a different mechanism.It may have some interfaces (in women with borderline perhaps), but in Stockholm syndrome it is based on a traumatic experience. Women often fall on ‘ wrong ‘ men (who you call narcissists here) during the fertile days.