A little nerves are healthy, it keeps you sharp.But they can also get in the way. A few pitfalls and what you can do about it:
- Think your story is not enough → hold on to your own story!
You have done all the preparations and when you were keen to consider it was a good plan, so please keep it fixed.
- Pro tip: Prepare every important conversation.
Know what you want to say, especially know what you don’t want to say! No matter if it’s a chat with a senior manager or a presentation for 1000 people, prepare it well.
An error response is harmful. A half answer is confusing. Long wait for an answer costs too much precious time.
- Pro-Tip: For those questions, take a notebook or create a parking space (whiteboard with a big P, write the questions there)
- Pro-Tip: Is printed, indicate when you come back to it; I have your answer Thursday morning
→ Hold on to your words, a short break between sentences is better than ‘ Euhm ‘.
- Pro-Tip: Prepare your story well, do a ‘ trial conversation ‘
- Pro-Tip: A moment’s silence is not bad at all!
Plan it in your presentation so you have a moment to step over and let the matter sink.
- Pro-Tip: Do and test conversation with a specific number of words per minute.
General Pro tip: Almost everyone is as uncertain as you are!Don’t let it notice that it’s what you do, the rest has nothing! Also as a rule, it just makes little out of it, people really attach less value to you. A mediocre presentation is fine! Better if you’re talking yourself in trouble.
I have been talking about borderline for a long time.Sometimes for about 50 – 100 people. That’s really not nothing though.
But I just started by saying that I am new here, and that I am very nervous, and therefore it actually disappeared almost immediately.
We are doing something new to us. OF COURSE you are nervous.Duh.
And by having it, instead of trying to hide it, you get rid of all the mystery.
People understand that best.We are very inclined to keep that kind of feelings for us, out of shame. But that is completely unnecessary, because there is nothing to be ashamed of.
Ah, Céline, that proves that you are an emotional man of flesh and blood and not a robot with artificial intelligence and an on and off button.I use the term ‘ stress rabbit ‘ for this. So from: ‘ Sorry, I have the bibber, but I’m such a stress rabbit ‘.
If I have to be very quiet at the dentist or worse, under local anesthesia at the eye surgeon, I am guaranteed to suffer from a trembling leg.The command ‘ You must lie still! ‘ does not help of course. But I then try to concentrate on toaster in the ceiling or the beep beep of a monitor.
For a speech or an interview on television (yes, I have also done and daring), the previous of course is not.My trick is then: Don’t point the word to the whole room, but pretend that only one person from the audience is your interlocutor. It works!
I once read that well-known stand-up comedians with stage fright are also concentrating on someone on the first row.
Finally, I want to confess that I also have trembling legs and ditto voice, when I am confronted with injustice.Then it is wise not to react immediately.
That you can not stop Céline, you are just a bit of a ‘ zenuwenlijer ‘.I do think it gets less as you make more of such conversations. It wears out gradually. A bit is good indeed. They are match nerves, which put you on sharply.
That is indeed mainly adrenaline, I used to talk a lot publicly for best groups of people.Here is the “checklist”
- Accept that you are nervous.
- Keep Speaking
- Learn from the feedback you get
- Start again at step 1.
That is indeed mainly adrenaline.(But not only, when one neurotransmitter or hormone changes, they all change. A bit like the gears in a clock work.) You can get pills for it, but then it never gets better without it.
When you admit that you are vibrating because you are nervous and that simply says, the nervousness falls off you. You immediately show that you want to focus on the purpose of the conversation and not on the obfuscating of your nervousness.
With your sincerity, you also give the other the chance to relax or to make a effort.