The answer lies in the way you formalise your question…
“Why is it so hard to find someone?
- This question is absolutely inaccurate.
What does“finding someone” and what does it meantofind” ?
Finding someone is certainly not difficult.There are enough people in this world. You could findsomeone at any time.But who is this one?
Most people have a certain idea of how to be someone.As soon as this person does not correspond to his own ideals, he is not shortlisted.
But many don’t even know what they’re looking for.Of course, everyone wants honesty,but what does that mean?Nobody is always 100% honest and if you tell her/him that she/he is boring.Be more specific to your
- Ideals through media
The ideal partner must lookgood, but what does that mean?Many men are already so corked by the ideals of appearance that they may know from beautiful pictures and videos from the Internet that they don’t allow anything else. But for many women, it is no different; they, on the other hand, are influenced by erotic novels and romances and have already built their ideal image together from it.
Isn’t it interesting to see that there are many men/women who go to exactly one person in the same room?Why are so many women on Heath Ledger and Jonny Depp when they don’t even know each other personally? Why are so many men on Mia Khalifa or Lisa Ann? Many sociological effects play a role here. The media dictate sparking what weliked.
- Personal ideal image
Now every person has personal ideas about appearance, height, weight, etc.Someone who does not correspond to a certain height is already not shortlisted, etc. (Note: Many women want a man who is 1.80 cm tall.Jonny Depp is “only” 1.78 cm tall and is still considered attractive. Opposition?)
- “… to find”
Most people believe the ideal man or the ideal woman lay around somewhere and you just have to find her.You would recognize them immediately according to your own ideals. So as soon as the man does not have the desired height or the woman does not have a certain chest circumference, this person is already not the ideal partner. A conversation is left out. You don’t “find” the right partner, you talk to people and something develops out of it that more and more corresponds to our ideal. But you can’t know if there’s no conversation.
What to do?
We can now discuss forever what exactly plays a role in the choice of partner.This is individual for each person and cannot simply be presented in a post like this. I can show much more how to improve the framework conditions for finding the right partner:
- Become aware of what you want: Write on what you really want.
Expand your horizons. There is much more interesting about a person than the appearance. Personality has many facets. Don’t have an ideal image but a spectrum of ideals that fit you.
If you think it is absolutely impossible for you to enter into a relationship with a person that has the following characteristics (absolutelydefine!) then write them down and set them.Acts on it.
Why would you want the ideal partner? Have confidence in yourself. Focus not only on onething, because someone who trains regularly, is well articulated, educated, has good behavior, is successful in life, etc.has more chances than someone who “only” regularly trains.
Get into the conversation! But what are we talking about?Ask your counterpart a few questions and then go into more detail. Ask. If you can’t do anything with the topics, ask why the other person is so fascinated by them. Let yourself be inspired and enthusiastic about others.
You can only improve the framework conditions. If you think you have given everything for it and you are in the same way as your own ideal, then something will come of it. Only no one can know how great you are if you don’t communicate it. PS: Nobody really wants to know how great you are.Everyone just thinks of themselves. As soon as you are interested in the other person, you are also interested in you.