With superficial conversations I assume that you meant; Common conversation or Smalltalk.
People have an urge to seek tension and sensation.Emotion is a kind of addiction. And there, film and game industries make good use of it.
We want expensive stuff because it’s valuable. Are excited when we go to an amusement park.We play games because of the tension.
This is different from logic.Logic is boring and mundane. Reading a book from a 1,000 pages is not a tension or ‘ thrill ‘ behind it. Just like logical conversation topics. Like the “How are you?” and “Where do you come from?” topics.You know; Ask too many questions, talk about work or where you come from. People keep these conversations every day. Why would you be more interesting?
What are emotionally charged subjects that grab people’s attention?Hiebij 2 interesting discussion topics;
- Glorified Gossibles
People love to give their opinion.It is in the nature of man. Make sure you also ask for another’s opinion. Let the other talk too.
You don’t always have to impress another.Give people the feeling that they impress you.
In this topic you talk about very emotionally charged subjects.Especially about others. The stories about people you know. The drama of a friend in your life. Also as people relations.
- “My brother was going to do this training and came into debt…”
- “A friend of mine has so for the first time a boyfriend and…”
You do not necessarily gossip as in that you are negative about them.You simply bring up interesting stories about others. And therefore ask for their opinion.
I have been talking to a girl in which we talked about how guys can talk so much about girls.And also how girls can talk a lot about guys. But when they have a partner they don’t look so attractive at all.
Finally, I asked her opinion; “What do you think of this?Guys can sometimes say anything but dare little “. She had to laugh and reacted; “Well, I know someone who…”
- Passions and interests
It is important that you have a passion.Nobody like someone who is boring. It is contagious when we see how interested and passionate a person is. It shows that a person doesn’t always have time for you and can come up with his own ideas.
Be on your hats!Some people are afraid to express their passion and ambition. So feel attacked by others their overwhelming passion.
Sometimes I come into a conversation to the point that we are talking about what we like to do.And then I tell about my hobby book reading. Then they usually react; “No, reading book is so boring”.And then I often react in character: “Heck you’re missing something! ” or “delicious!” This is different from “Oh maybe you are right.Reading book is somewhat boring but I like it “.It shows that you have to bend your passions for another. Do not do so.. It is strange, for me, it is almost to be expected that people will react so well. So often I deliberately tell you that I like it. And shoot in laughter when I hear that they don’t find anything.
Also let the other talk about their interests.If you can find out their intrensic hidden passions, they can sometimes keep chatting for hours.
Other topics are holidays, music taste, future plans, childhood, et cetera.If you are wondering how you can introduce these topics you can do that from an observation. Such as “Your name reminds me of my old primary school friend…”, “That person reminds me of this event. ..” or “your descent reminds me of this holiday…”.Instead of forcing the subject; “There is this holiday…”, “I know this person...”.
Don’t understand it wrong, I’m not a guru in social interaction.I can tell a lot about this but I myself am really bad in this. I keep my conversations on feeling. Or share ideas that overshoot me.
You might also observe others and see what they are talking about and how they do it.