It’s not to say that you can use it to recognize people with borderline, or that everyone with borderline has all these features.But here are in any case some examples that can give an indication:
- Too quick to tell personal details (to a stranger for example)
- Equal intensely attach, also very intensely attach to friends/family/acquaintances, cling and do everything for the ones to make sure they still see him or her standing and not leaving
- Sometimes they come very childly and dependent on them and expect you to be responsible for removing their fears and listening to their feelings (they want you to take care of them and love them).
Often you see that they expect this from others, but do not know that they are not there for others. “He/she will never even ask how it goes with me”-but never actually ask another one.
They experience emotions as very violent and painful
Something small can already trigger this fear
They often go very much into the minds of others and change their mind quickly (don’t seem to have a real opinion)
There is not a fixed pattern of behavior that you may notice that someone has borderline.The symptoms vary a lot of intermediaries, and in the person with borderline the behavior depends very much on the context.
I write this anonymously because there are some private experiences between those who don’t go about myself.I have many friends and family with borderline and also work in that target group. I will mention a number of points which I personally encounter a lot.
- The person seems to be very different per situation.
So I had a friend who was completely different when we accidentally encountered a knowledge of him. You won’t recognize that person back. And once that other is gone, it seems to be ‘ normal ‘ again.
Sometimes someone seems to contradict themselves even in a sentence. There is confusion about what someone thinks, because many people with borderline do not seem to have a sense of a core in themselves. As an example, I can say that first someone finds something very nice about another, but then says to disturb.
This can occur in all sorts of forms, for example an extreme reaction to a forgotten message, crooked eyes if you kept talking to another one for too long. In quiet borderline it can take some time before you get overwhelmed with paranoia and then it is wrong right. Example: I had been friends with my ex for a couple of years before we got a relationship and I had dropped in that time that a joint friend in appearance was a bit more my type. That came to me in the final relationship to be very expensive, whenever I went to do what with that friend I came home in a cross trial.
A sincere compliment can make that person flourish, even more than usual. I experience with different people that they really are going to shine. It’s not really a distinctive feature, but still worth naming here:)
And not necessarily what is going to be eaten tonight, but more that you do not know whether or not the person will remain friends with you, because because of their own abandonment fear they seem to be able to hit the flight every time something they find scary. It is therefore important to keep the best possible communication, so that doubts can be discussed as soon as possible. This is not necessarily distrust in an individual, more of a problem in adhesion.
I’ve heard this as “Jeckyll and Hyde” “Angel and Devil” and simply “I don’t know if I’m good or bad”. In women I hear that less, but that can lie to me. Here you hear “splitting” in back. You will often hear that the person is not well aware of who he/she is when you ask for a moment.
When I asked her why she specifically kept her film her so she didn’t know anything. It seemed to be “empty” why she liked something. A friend ever wanted to give me his entire CD collection of his former favourite band, it didn’t do anything anymore. As if memories of themselves are wiped out.
And it’s often the sweetest people, it’s always cozy and fun.I hope this can help.