I think I’m a bit a-typically woodlandschar with my fear of people I don’t know.
I’ve always just done what I found that had to happen.Speaking a room with a hundred colleagues, while the sweat gussed from my head and both vibred my legs so violently that it was no longer under control.
Yes, if I had to speak in public, I invariably got a red head and the sweat broke me out.The last decade is going to be better, but I often get red and I also more than anything else and sometimes I forget to breathe quietly, so that my phrase just doesn’t get the finish line.
During the holidays it’s all no different.Sometimes I even try to sing along, something I can’t do at all and what attracts attention by itself because I can’t keep a measure and no tone.
Well, we have to do it all with what we can and how we can do it.I can think and write, and also talk, but less easy in public. As you get older and you’ve just always done it, it becomes easier to live with such a trait. Oh well, still nice for others to see that they do not do so badly at all.
Oh well, the holidays… still often a bit whipped up with compulsory cosiness.I am also often not clear to whom it is exactly a feast.
But an opinion: get as many one-to-one contacts as possible.Be curious, inquire about someone’s life, the lust and the burdens, listen, don’t feel obliged to say genius things.
And at that big table with O so many people: limit you as it can to your neighbor/neighbor, concentrate on the dishes, listen to the buzz and know: I don’t need anything.
Incidentally, it helps to tell people that you are not doing so well in companies.Usually it does. During the holidays you run the risk that one uncle, after having had too much wine once again, will cross the dragon with your problem. Then there is only one thing: give him equal. Compliment him with his great humor. And publicly agree what he says, that this is difficult for you, and say that it becomes even harder when drunk people are going to give their opinion about you but that tomorrow you are willing to hear the many wise men of the drunk uncle.
There are also excellent therapies and trainings for social anxiety.
I’m not bothered by that now because I’m not four, so I can actually sit at home alone, and watch a movie and eat what I like.
But knowing me, I can feel quite overwhelmed (and quite in the side of strangers), if there is a social meeting.
So for me it is important to celebrate in a small circle where I know everyone and it also helps if I have already seen the family members or partners of my acquaintances or friends circle.
But I usually go with people who like to be on their own.That’s not conscious, but it just happens by itself.
Often we attract similar people into our lives.
You know, all that fuss is necessary for nothing.We give ourselves so much stress by imposing so much on us, while that is not really necessary.
Maybe we feel an outsider because we don’t get involved in the rest, but I’m not really sad since I enjoy my own company.
But I also understand that social contact is a very normal and natural need (for the one already more than the other).
I actually love silence, peace and tranquility.Maybe because I grew up in a noisy environment.
Serenity was now not exactly my familie芒 鈧劉 s strongest side (hahaha).
So now I really do craker.I can enjoy just sitting in the silence and watching a series and eating something delicious.
Until recently, it was difficult and frightening for me to be alone, because I was so accustomed to having people around me every time, so it took a while before feeling good (and safe) in m芒 鈧劉 n vel.
But this had to do with traumatic experiences that I had gained as a child.
As soon as I was aware of this and had learned to deal with my uncertainties, fears and pains, I felt in time v脙 漏 脙 漏 l better and also a lot more confident of myself.
So now I find it quite OK to be alone (but I would lie I had to say that I am not a bit wrong to be with others).
I am also not in the ability to receive others (by my health).I easily get exhausted and now really need time for myself.
But if I had to celebrate, I would outsource part of the work to others (for example, asking each guest to bring a dish).
And then make something easy to prepare, but still different from what I normally prepare (so that one can see that I have deployed myself).
The rest I would possibly buy and I would also ask that one should know clearly in advance who is coming.
PS social anxiety can be cured (I was very bothered by it myself until recently, but it has improved enormously now-I can go back to the people without feeling very anxious about it, but I still prefer to contact people I really know, Because I then know what I can expect-too big groups make me tired and overwhelm me, and smaller groups work better for me)
The crowds outside of that I avoid as much as possible because I get mad and annoying from word.I just have to think about it or I feel irritated me, bah! Should I want to shop I would do it well in advance or just online.
(I hope you are helped)
Maybe you could explain your question with a context?Is it about public speaking? Meet people at parties or drinks? Dealing with obligations that you are imposed?
I think it is important that you are honest about what you are actually afraid of and then set realistic goals.If you need to meet people and you already feel social anxiety in the invitation alone, try to set a goal that does not feel like a high mountain. Go at all, imagine for example 5 people (and look at them for example).
I am not an expert in the field of social psychology, but I think it is important that you are honest with yourself.What do you want? What do you think scary? What do you like? A tip might be that you’re writing it out. If you give the beast a name, it is easier to deal with it. If you did not appoint something, then you do not see it, but it is there.