It’s very difficult, but I can get you out of my experience given some tips.
If you are still living together, it is more difficult.But one thing is for sure, make sure you spend enough time with your child alone without the father always being in the picture.
I have experienced this as a child but in my case my mother was narcisist.What I noticed when I was older is that I actually barely knew my father. My dad worked, but was at night and on weekends just home. Unless he was travelling. But nevertheless, I barely had a relationship with him. He never took ‘ time out ‘ for me and for him. So growing up I have all my scheduling from my mother, and these weren’t always the best.
When I was 30 years old, I found out that I actually didn’t know my father so well.So I deliberately made a relationship with him and my mother was already not very happy because she felt shut out. I have said to her that I found it very important to have a relationship with my father without having to have an opinion.
My point is that narcisists want to have very often attention or get, less often give attention to others.So if you want to educate your child in a healthy way while the father is so, I can tell you now that you never will ever change the father. Narcisists never change. You can change, by addressing your own way of doing things
- Give attention where attention really fits.
Do not try on any minor hassles or conversations that he will start. An example, so I have a child with a narcisist, we are apart. He always starts a remark about something and this excites me frustrations. I’ve learned to just respond to things that are really important and the rest -not important -can just get away
Let your child know you. Do it now, and get to work with it consciously. The father probably won’t like it. Because narcisists are best suspicious. But keep this as a habit. You do not have to go to another country, no, just say, that it is mama-child moment, and you are going to play, go to the cinema, shop whatever. Start with this habit now so that it becomes no problem later
Children know very well if it does not go well between mom and dad. So try to bring the father’s positive things out to your child as much as possible. Other people, friends, etc. can be different. But never consciously lay a threshold between child and father, it is not worth it and children still find out who is who. My mother, when I was 30 years old and deliberately went to look up a relationship with my own father, said that if I did, I never had to speak to her again… Well 10 years later she doesn’t speak to me at all. On one side I think, yes that has been your choice, and on the other hand I have a great relationship with my father and he loves me exactly how I am.
They will not understand you as well unless they have to deal with a narcisist. But make appointments, don’t isolate yourself from your own support network. A narcisist wants you to stay with them alone, they will often tend to make sure that your friends and family come out of your life. It will not happen from one day to another, but if you do not pay attention, one day.. Are you going to look around you and then you see that anyone with whom you ever had a relationship is suddenly no longer. Don’t be afraid, contact them again and grab a social life again.
I France that father.I have been separated from my partner for almost 4 years now and our son is 9 and a half.
I can’t emphasize it often enough-yes, I write this reply anonymously out of respect for my ex and my son, but the attentive reader knows how to find my normal user name-that there is no narcissistic personality that you can Shaving.For that, “we” are far too complicated.
Nor can you simply say that your child is not brought up properly or healthily by a narcissistic father.Only when you see the direct consequences of this, can you judge it.
For example, I know exactly where my defects are in the parenting.I am unable to provide my son structure. His mother can do that much better. And he certainly still needs it. But on the other hand, I see that his mother is completely in the fog with other things.
For example, the relationships with men she has.The kind of men they have relationships with. How THOSE men deal with my son. The way they escorted him with his homework. The conversations she DOESN’T have with him about things that keep him busy.
So the question is but what is healthy educating is. And for the 1000th time, whether you’re dealing with a narcissistic personality or with a sociopath.Narcisten are not antisocial acorns.
‘, ‘ The child is learning that ‘ rejection ‘ usually arises from fear, instead of being able to appreciate it, and a weakness and attempting to bring down your own value or self-image in order to have power over you, resulting from our own uncertainty and low self-esteem.Then T will be good:-)
“,” Kill the Father