How can you best get off self-destructive behavior?

In the years that I coach people, I have discovered that we all have patterns that keep us away from success.I do it myself sometimes.

These are the 7 ways in which we sabotage ourselves and trigger self-destructive behavior.

1.You ask yourself the wrong questions
Don’t spend your time and energy on what-if questions like what if it’s impossible?What if I’m not good enough? What if this is not the right decision? These questions do not help you further and suck all the energy and motivation out of your way.

Change them into how, who and what-questions, such As: How do I tackle this?What is the first step? Who can help me?
This way you spend your energy finding answers that bring you closer to success.

2.You compare yourself with others
Whether you want to start a business or learn a new skill, you are always looking for others who have made it to you.If you do the same as they do, you also expect to achieve the same results.
But what you don’t see are their setbacks and failures, and all the obstacles they have overcome along the way.So you can think that they weren’t there, and that others were immediately successful. The moment you get the trouble yourself, you feel discouraged and unsuccessful.

So You focus on where you are today, and how far you have hit since yesterday. That will give you a better picture of your own progress.

3.You are waiting for permission from others
We all want the approval of those who are dear to us.In your head, their approval means that you are on the right track. You don’t want to be disappointed. And so you get stuck and let yourself be paralyse by a critical remark or a luse reaction. Don’t let that happen.

ONLY You know what is best for you. Rely on your gut feeling, live according to your own standards, and create the life that makes you happy.


You expect immediate results
What?I have put so much effort into this, and nobody has noticed it? What a loss of time, I can better stop it right away. ” That’s about what I thought myself, after I had posted my first reply to Quora.So be patient, be consistent and give yourself a realistic timeline to achieve the results you want.

5.You listen to everyone except yourself
You’re new, so find your advice.Everyone has an opinion on the subject, so you listen to everyone. You think they are all experts who know what they are talking about, and so you have to follow their advice so as not to fail terribly. The problem is that those opinions push you in all possible directions , so you end up paralyzed and do nothing .Listen and learn, and then follow your own instinct.Trust that you will find your own way, and that which will be the right thing for you.

6.You wait for the ‘ right ‘ moment
Sometimes you continue to postpone something, because it is not yet the ‘ right ‘ moment. You have to adjust it some more, you have to gain some more experience, you have to learn some extra things.You wait until the economy is better, or the weather, or there is a sign that you should start.
All these things are just procrastination tactics of your brain.The right time is now.
Only by starting can you discover what you can adjust and improve afterwards, never before.

7.You take no action
You make lists, and beautiful plans.You re-write those plans and use a cool app to rework them. You are talking about your plans, visualizing them, watching them critically. In other words, you do everything except perform them and take action.

While your first step, your first action, however small, is more useful than any of the world’s plans. It is even possible that your first step changes all your previous plans.So spend your time on acting, not planning, if you want to achieve something.

Keep thinking positively: Do not let the fun things spoil by negative thought jumps that really pass by pills and/or talk; The latter can come up with a house Geno (e), a friend or someone you take during a walk (Etje)-Always a good idea to put your mind to rest-coincidentally.Eventually with an expert P-nurse, therapist (e) or doctor.

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