Yes, my kids do exactly what I say.
The reason for this is that I give them as much freedom as is safe-they know that I am saying something, I have a good reason for that.
My approach is that children are not stupid, but inexperienced.What is logical or obvious to us, they still need to learn or experience. I see it as my enjoyable task, as their father, to create an environment in which they can do that in all security.
My children know that by now, and understand that it is in their own interest to listen when I say something-and I don’t say anything often.
I join John Willemsen.From the beginning I left my son free to discover things myself. This way you learn the fastest, through our own experience.
We also like to talk about anything and everything, sometimes I also ask my son ‘ what do you think of it?I like to involve him in the things that are part of everyday life. Sometimes he comes up with things that I think ‘ I hadn’t looked at yet ‘ and that’s exactly what I’m trying to teach him. There is no right or wrong if you are looking for a solution. Do not think that you yourself have all the wisdom in lease and also dare to ask for help.
By doing so I notice that my son often comes to me in advance.Then he says ‘ I want to do this and that and I think I’ll do so, what do you think? ‘
So I have the opportunity to say to him ‘ well thought out! ‘ or ‘ Have you thought of that? ‘ so we have no criticism of each other but positive feedback.If it is different from what we thought I will hear that by itself and come back with a new version of his plan.
So there is a lot of listening to each other at our home and talking about feeling.
At a human level, I think everyone should be able to appeal to each other.
My son clearly knows where the boundary lies between ‘ we speak to each other as a fellow man ‘ and ‘ mother-son ‘.Of course now that he starts to pubate he does not listen, or sooner he does not want to do it right. Where I could just say to him ‘ pull out your coat because it will rain ‘ and this was also immediately followed I now see that he refuses a bit. He is not going into discussion. It takes literally 10 seconds longer. Just a little stretch because it can.
I say nothing about it.Whether it takes 5 seconds or 10, you have your jacket on. Goal achieved;)
Of course not, my children had early on that daddy makes jokes, and that IE challenges them to think for themselves.I sometimes say very weird things, things they better not be able to do. And luckily they have it.
That also means that if I really believe something, they can still find something else.And that also happens regularly, with varying results. Luckily they have a fine moral compass. If I make a joke that they can try the water gun on the cat, they find that pathetic and I get the full layer, if I ask them to help someone else then they do that often.